Issue 5 ‘Herd In The Hallways”


“I love a man that smells like fresh compost and tilapia.”

“How do you gaslight someone into hiring you?”

“One time I dislocated my elbow and my teacher told me to walk it off.”

Person 1: “Ugh, I have so many veins in my forearms.”
Person 2: “Dude, I have never heard someone complain about having veins in their forearms.”

“Wait, Titanic was real?”

“My natural happiness is too high, and regular sad feels like depression.”

“I am not a brie kind of guy.”

“I wish I could travel back in time and spend a week in my mom’s uterus.”

“It is hard to stab mac and cheese.”

“I have eight different spellings of neutrons in my notes.”

“Volleyball makes me want to gyrate.”

“I find it so weird that the sun isn’t Crayola yellow.”

“If the AP Chem syllabi were converted to USD, I would be as wealthy as Jeff Bezos.”

“I don’t remember what I ate for Thanksgiving.”

“Legos are amazing. They’re an intricate interlocking brick system, not toys.

“I am hungry for volleyball.”

“Too much dip, not enough chip.”